When the Pawn
Album - 9 novembre 1999 - Debaser id 21818

All my life is on me now, hail the pages turning
And the future's on the bound, hell don't know my fury

You're all I need, you're all I need, you're all I need
You're all I need, you're all I need, you're all I need
You're all I need - and maybe some faith would
Do me good

I don't know what I'm doing, don't know should I
Change my mind, I can't decide, there's too many
Variations to consider
No thing I do don't do no thing but bring me
More to do,
It's true, I do imbue my blue unto myself,
I make it bitter
Baby, lay your head on my lap one more time
Tell me you belong to me
Baby say that it's all gonna be alright
I believe that it isn't.

You're all I need, you're all I need, you're all I need
You're all I need, you're all I need, you're all I need
You're all I need -

and maybe some faith would do me good
and maybe some faith would do me good
and maybe some faith would do me good

You wanna make me sick
You wanna lick my wounds
Don't you, baby?

You want the badge of honour when you save my hide
But you're the one in the way of the day of doom, baby
If you need my shame to reclaim your pride

And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists
I never did anything to you, man
But no matter what I try
You'll beat me with your bitter lies
So call me crazy, hold me down
Make me cry, get off now, baby
It won't be long 'till you'll be
Lying limp in your own hands

You feed the beast I have within me
You wave the red flag, baby you make it run, run, run
Standing on the sidelines, waving and grinning
You fondle my trigger, then you blame my gun

And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists
I never did anything to you, man
But no matter what I try
You'll beat me with your bitter lies
So call me crazy, hold me down
Make me cry, get off now, baby
It won't be long till you'll be
Lying limp in your own hands

And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists
I never did anything to you, man
But no matter what I try
You'll beat me with your bitter lies
So call me crazy, hold me down
Make me cry, get off now, baby
It won't be long till you'll be
Lying limp in your own hands

I was staring at the sky
Just looking for a star
To pray on, or wish on
Or something like that
I was having a sweet fix
Of a daydream of a boy
Whose reality, I knew,
Was a hopeless to be had
But then the dove of hope
Began its downward slope
And I believed for a moment that
My chances were
Approaching to be grabbed
But as it came down near,
So did a weary tear
I thought it was a bird,
But it was just a paper bag

Hunger hurts,
And I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts but starvin' works
When it costs too much to love

And I went crazy again today
Looking for a strand to climb
Looking for a little hope
Baby said he couldn't stay
Wouldn't put his lips to mine
A fail to kiss is a fail to cope
I said, "Honey, I don't feel so good,
Don't feel justified.
Come on put a little love here in my void"
He said "It's all in your head"
And I said "So's everything"
But he didn't get it
I thought he was a man
But he was just a little boy

Hunger hurts, and I want him
So bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works
When it costs... too much to love

Hunger hurts, but I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I am a mess that he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold because these hands are just too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works me
When it costs... too much to love

Hunger hurts, but I want him so bad, oh it kills me
'Cause I know that I'm a mess that he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold because these hands are just too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving, it works
When it costs too much to love

I'm gonna make a mistake
I'm gonna do it on purpose
I'm gonna waste my time

'Cause I'm full as a tick
And I'm scratching at the surface
And what I find is mine

And when the day is done, and I look back
And the fact is I had fun, fumbling around
All the advice I shunned, and I ran
Where they told me not to run, but I sure had fun, so

I'm gonna fuck it up again
I'm gonna do another detour
Unpave my path

And if you wanna make sense
What you looking at me for
I'm no good at math

And when I find my way back
The fact is I just may stay, or I may not
I've acquired quite a taste for
A well-made mistake I wanna make a mistake
Why can't I make a mistake?

I'm always doing what I think I should
Almost always doing everybody good
Why

Do I wanna do right, of course but
Do I really wanna feel I'm forced to
Answer you, hell no
I've acquired quite a taste for
A well-made mistake, I wanna make a mistake
Why can't I make a mistake

I'm always doing what I think I should
Almost always doing everybody good
Why

I let the beast in too soon
I don't know how to live without my hand on his throat
I fight him always and still
Oh darling it's so sweet
You think you know how crazy
How crazy I am
You say you don't spook easy
You won't go, but I know
And I pray that you will

Fast as you can
Baby run, free yourself of me
Fast as you can

I may be soft in your palm
But I'll soon grow hungry for a fight
And I will not let you win
My pretty mouth will frame the phrases that will
Disprove your faith in man
So if you catch me trying to find my way into your
Heart from under your skin

Fast as you can
Baby scratch me out, free yourself
Fast as you can
Fast as you can
Baby scratch me out, free yourself
Fast as you can

Sometimes my mind don't shake and shift
But most of the time, it does
And I get to the place where I'm begging for a lift
Or I'll drown in the wonders and the was
And I'll be your girl if you say it's a gift
And you give me some more of your drugs
Yeah, I'll be your pet if you just tell me it's a gift
Cause I'm tired of whys choking on whys,
Just need a little because because

I let the beast in and then
I even tried forgiving him but it's too soon
So I'll fight again, again, again, again, again
And for a little while more
I'll soar the uneven wind
Complain and blame the sterile land
But if you're getting any bright ideas, quiet dear
I'm blooming within

Fast as you can
Baby wait watch me, I'll be out
Fast as I can
Maybe late but at least about
Fast as you can
Leave me, let this thing run its route

Fast as you can... (4x)

I wouldn't know what to do with another chance
If you gave it to me
I couldn't take the embrace of a real romance
It'd race right through me
I'm much better off the way things are
Much much better off, better by far, by far

I wouldn't know what to say to a gentle voice
It'd roll right past me
And if you chalk it up you'll see I don't really have a choice
So don't even ask me
I'm much better off, the way things are
Much much better off, better by far

So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on
And I'll keep kicking the crap till it's gone
If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle
And as soon as I settle, I bet I'll be able to move on

How can I fight, when we're on the same side
How can I fight beside you

So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on
And I'll keep kicking the crap till it's gone
If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle
And as soon as I settle, I bet I'll be able to move on

So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on
And I'll keep kicking the crap till it's gone
If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle
And as soon as I settle, I bet I'll be able to move on

How many times
Do I have to say
To get away--get gone

Flip your shit past another lass's
Humble dwelling

You got your game, made your shot
And you got away with a lot, but I'm not
Turned on

So put away that meat you're selling
Cuz I do know what's good for me
And I've done what I could for you
But you're not benefiting
And yet I'm sitting
Singing again
Sing, sing again

How can I deal with this
If he won't get with this
Am I gonna heal from this
He won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out,
I gotta get him out
It's time the truth goes out
That he don't give a shit about me

Cuz I do know what's good for me
And I've done what I could for you
But you're not benefiting
And yet I'm sitting
Singing again
Sing, sing again

How can I deal with this
If he won't get with this
Am I gonna heal from this
He won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out
I gotta get him out
It's time the truth goes out
That he don't give a shit about me

How many times can it escalate
Till it elevates to a place I can't breathe?

And I must decide
If you must deride
That I'm much obliged
To up and go

I'll idealize and realize
That it's no sacrifice, because the price is paid
And there's nothing left to grieve

Fuckin go
Cuz I've done what I could for you
And I do know what's good for me
And I'm not benefiting
Instead I'm sitting
Singing again, singing again, singing again
Sing, sing, sing again

How can I deal with this
If he won't get with this
Am I gonna heal from this
He won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out
I gotta get him out
It's time the truth goes out
That he don't give a shit about me

How can I deal with this
If he won't get with this
Am I gonna heal from this
He won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out
I gotta get him out
It's time the truth goes out
That he don't give a shit about me

So be it, I'm your crowbar
If that's what I am so far
Until you get out of this mess
And I will pretend
That I don't know of your sins
Until you are ready to confess
But all the time, all the time
I'll know, I'll know
And you can use my skin
To bury secrets in
And I will settle you down
And at my own suggestion,
I will ask no questions
While I do my thing in the background
But all the time, all the time
I'll know, I'll know
Baby-I can't help you out, while she's still around
So for the time being, I'm being patient
And amidst this bitterness
If you'll just consider this-even if it don't make sense
All the time-give it time
And when the crowd becomes your burden
And you've early closed your curtains,
I'll wait by the backstage door
While you try to find the lines to speak your mind
And pry it open, hoping for an encore
And if it gets too late, for me to wait
For you to find you love me, and tell me so
It's ok, don't need to say it.