Back in the Madhouse
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Here they come
Here come the bastards

I heard it from a confidant -
Who heard it from a confidant
They're definitely on their way
There's one with this idea
Something about a
hammer head shark
Nosehairs and flatus
Best keep your distance because

Here they come
here come the bastards

Bury your head deep in the sand
Anonyminity is a virtue
in this day and age
Amazing hand dexterity
Flagrant misuse of security
Better run, run, run, run, run
Run Run Run Run, here they come.

I pull the blinds then I take my clothes off
Dance around the house like nature boy
My genitalia and pectoral muscles
aren't quite what I would like them to be

But you don't see me
No one can see me

I pull my blinds
Fill out my income tax form
Pen in hand I write so legibly
I have my kitty. His name is Allowishus,
I stroke him

But you don't see me
No one should see me

I pull the blinds
For the sun glares off my tele
and I find it quite so irritating
I have my videos - loads of Ren and Stimpy
Bottom - a bit of pornography

But you don't see me
No one should see me

Well, I've been known to tell a tale in two, and three, and four
And I've been persecuted sicne I sailed in through the door
And I've been known to sing a song in three, and four, and five
And I've been getting my ass chewed since the day I arrived here

But you don't see
No one should see me

I've seen them out at Soco
They're pounding sixteen penny nails
The truckers on the interstate
Have been known to ride the rails
The sweat is beating on the brow
Can't keep these fellas down
'Cause those damned blue-collared tweekers
Are runnin' this here town

I knew a man who hung drywall
He hung it mighty quick
A trip or two to the blue room
Would help him do the trick
His foreman would pat him on the back
Whenever he would come around
'Cause these dammed blue-collar tweekers
Are beloved in this here town



Now the union boys are there
To protect us from all the corporate type
While curious George's drug patrol
Is out here hunting snipe
Now they try to tell me different
But you know I ain't no clown
'Cause those damned blue-collar tweekers
Are the backbone of this town

Now the flame that burns twice as bright
Burns only half as long
My eyes are growing weary
As I finalize this song
So sit back and have a cup o' joe
And watch the wheels go round
'Cause those damned blue-collar tweekers
Have always run this town

I had a friend that took a belt,
Took a belt and hung himself
Hung himself in the doorway
Of the apartment where he lived
His woman and his little bro
Came home from the grocery store
Only to find him dangling
In the apartment where he lived

I had a friend who shaved his head
Put his Doctor Martins on
And drew such wonderous pictures
In the apartment where he lived
He praised my creativity,
Though he spoke sarcastically
Oh, the conversations
In the apartment where he lived

I had a friend that took a belt,
Took a belt and hung himself
Hung himself in the doorway
Of the apartment where he lived
Rock, she thought him spiteful;
Ler, he thought him pitiful
Me, I've never been back to the apartment where he lived

My name is Mud
Not to be confused with Bill or Jack or Pete or Dennis
My name is mud and it's always been
'Cause I'm the most boring sons-a-bitch you've ever seen
I dress in blue-yes navy blue
From head to toe I'm rather drab except my patent shoes
I make 'em shine, well most the time
'Cept today my feet are troddin' on by this friend of mine
Six foot two and rude as hell
I got to get him in the ground before he starts to smell
My name is Mud

My name is Mud, but call me Aloysius Devadander Abercrombie
That's long for Mud so I've been told
Told that by this sonsabitch that lies before me bloated blue and cold
I've got my pride, I drink my wine
I'd drink only the finest 'cept I haven't earned a dime in several months
Or were it years
The breath on that fat bastard could bring any man to tears
We had our words, a common spat
So I kissed him upside the cranium with that aluminum baseball bat
My name is Mud

When the going gets tough
And the stomach acids flow
The cold wind of conformity
Is nipping at your nose
When some trendy new atrocity
Has brought you to your knees
Come with us we'll sail the
Seas of Cheese

Jerry was a race car driver
He drove so goddamned fast
He never did win no checkered flag
But he never did come in last
Jerry was a race car driver
He'd say "El solo number one"
With a bocephus sticker on his 442
He'd light 'em up just for fun

Captain Pierce was a fireman
Richmond engine #3
I'll be a wealthy man when I get a dime
For all the things that man taught to me
Captain Pierce was a strong man
Strong as any man alive
It stuck in his craw
That they made him retire at the age of 65

"Dog will hunt"

Jerry was a race car driver
22 years old
Had too many cold beers one night
And wrapped himself around a telephone pole

Too many puppies are being shot in the dark.
Too many puppies are trained not to bark.
At the sight of blood that must be spilled so that we may maintain
our oil fields.
Too many puppies.
Too many puppies.
Too many puppies are taught to heel.
Too many puppies are trained to kill.
On the command of men wearing money belts that buy mistresses
sleek animal pelts.
Too many puppies.
Too many puppies.
Too many puppies.
Too many puppies.
Too many puppies with guns in their hands.
Too many puppies in foreign lands.
Are dressed up sharp in suits of green and placed upon the war
machine.
Too many puppies are just like me.
Too many puppies are afraid to see.
The visions of the past brought to life again,
too many puppies, too many dead men.

t was a weekend's eve,
I had sex on my breath
I was lookin' for somethin' to see.
With a borrowed black leather
And my best fishin' hat.
Well, it was just Wendy O. and me.

We called old Swamp
Up on the telephone
And said we was comin' on
Down to pick him up
and then, he said,
"Hey Swampy, me and Greeny'll come along -

But only if we can bring a friend."
"His name is Harold."
I said "Okay."

Now, we had a
Swamper, Greeny, Wendy O, Stanley,
Harold of the Rocks and me.
We hopped into my dart
And headed for the nightbreak
To see a man they call Schooly D.

Harold he's a friendly guy.
He rambles on and on.
He'll talk the balls off a rhinosaurus.
Fact is, he just doesn't make much sense.

"Well", Stan said.
"This guy's pretty bizarre, Gus."

Harold of the Rocks.

I saw Harold at a party
Trouzy threw late one night.
I said, "hey man,
Do you remember me?"
He said, "O' course
I do Snapdad and
Let me tell ya right
'Bout now I'm lit
Up like an ol' Christmas tree."

Hey bro you know I'd
like to thank you once again for let'n me
Hang with ya' all across the bay.
when I look back at that night I get me a
Warm spot across my heart."
Then he shook my hand, and walked away.
That's the last I seen of Harold.

Harold of the Rocks.

So in the end,
Swamper and Greeny
Finally succumb to
The ways of Harold.
And in doing so
Each gave just a little bit
Of his soul away.
What a couple of dumbshits.